Tag Archives: grandmother

women of valor

beach-child-clouds-325265

It’s coming up on that time of year again. For some it can be a very joyous time. For others, it can be one of the worst struggles of the year. Strangely enough I’m talking about Mother’s Day. I remember for seven years of infertility, this was one of the most difficult Sunday’s in the church calendar. I even remember one year, shortly after a miscarriage, that my wife was even called upon to help hand out Mother’s Day gifts to the moms who were there that Sunday. And I imagine this Sunday can be difficult like that for a variety of reasons. Perhaps you have lost your mother this year. Maybe you don’t get to be with your family. Perhaps you’ve never had the family you wished for. None of these things should make you feel less or even allow a church to overlook you in their festivities. If anything, Monther’s Day should be a celebration of women regardless of their stage in life or the identity by which they are known.

One of the most frustrating things to me as a male is the degree to which we as the church often reflect society in the means of which we ask our women to measure up. Sometimes, even on Mother’s Day, women in the church feel the need to evaluate themselves based on a rubric that I’m sure the Bible never intended. Why in the world a Hallmark Card holiday would bring about this type of self-evaluation, I don’t know…but the phenomenon exists all the same. One of the passages of scripture that often gets pulled out for this type of self-inventory is Proverbs 31:10-31. This passage of scripture is known traditionally among the Jewish people as Eshet Chayil or The Woman of Valor. And if we read it at face value it can be intimidating…can a woman really be expected to do all of these things? If this is the ruler that anyone is expected to measure themselves by then not only would our women fall short, but I’m pretty sure most of the men would as well.

Sometimes, though, it pays to seek out an understanding of a Jewish text from Jewish history. I know it sounds crazy. But when it comes to this passage, the Eshet Chayil, before every Sabbath, a husband would read/recite this poem to his wife to praise her for all that she is (not all that she has done). It wasn’t a score card…but an embellishment and adoration of all that she was and meant to her husband and family before they entered into the rest of Sabbath. It reads a lot different now. Hear these words as if in adulation from a husband to his wife,

“‘Many women act competently,
    but you surpass them all!’
Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting,
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” – Proverbs 31:29-30

And women of the church…this is who you are. When you enter through the doors of the sanctuary on Sunday morning, you are a woman of valor. When you find yourself worshiping although you are broken by years of infertility, you are a woman of valor. When you join the congregation in prayer although you’ve lost your own mother or even a child, you are a woman of valor. When you celebrate in the means of grace even though it seems you may never be called ‘mom’, you are a woman of valor. When you participate in the body of Christ, even when you feel misunderstood or undervalued, you are a woman of valor; and your worth is far greater than jewels.

 

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love

I’m not sure how most of your homes work, but ours has always had a division of labor. Certain tasks fall to my wife and certain tasks fall to me. With the exception of rocking infants, one of my tasks has always been the bedtime ritual. I imagine a large part of the motivation of this division is due to my wife’s exhaustion after handling the kids most of the day, but it is a task I have gladly accepted. This usually includes making sure teeth are brushed, pajamas are on, stories are read, prayers are said and kisses and hugs are distributed equally. Last night as I was putting the bigs (this is now the affectionate term given to the two older kids) to bed I leaned over to hug my daughter and she blurted out, “God loves you, God loves me, God loves the whole world and God loves grandmother” (I’m still not sure why my maternal grandmother gets her own line, but if you knew her you might understand that a bit more). But I was touched by her innocence and the profoundness of that assurance that she had.

I think sometimes we think differently about God’s love. Maybe we feel it is something that we have to earn. Maybe we feel sometimes we think it is something that we aren’t deserving of. Maybe sometimes we think it is meant for someone else and not for us. Maybe sometimes we get that turned around and think of others as unlovable by God. But I come back to this again, “God loves you, God loves me, God loves the whole world.” We find this declaration in one of the most often quoted passages of scripture in the whole of the Bible. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” – John 3:16. It doesn’t say that God loved a certain portion of the world. Or that God loved the people that look like me, act like me, dress like me, etc. The text says that God loved(s) the world…This is why he came. This is why he gave his life. Because he loves us all.

I have read many books about theology and Biblical thought in my scholastic career and in my time as a pastor. But I really think that sometimes we forget how simple this message is for you and for me. Sometimes I like to sing the following to myself as a little reminder:   Jesus loves me this I know,
For the Bible tells me so;
Little ones to Him belong,
They are weak but He is strong.
Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
The Bible tells me so.

“God loves you, God loves me, God loves the whole world”. If you get nothing else from this today, I pray that you are able to rest in the love of God. A love that was not passive, but gave everything to redeem you. A love that is never-ending, unstoppable, always and forever, divine in nature, looking beyond my faults and calling me his own kind of love. This is the kind of love God has for you and for me.

 

 

 


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