Category Archives: love

petty

mosquito sucking bloodA couple of years ago my wife and I got to spend a day with one of our professors from college. I say “our” even though I never took him for a class,  because of how instrumental he was in shaping both of our paths. My wife often says that she would have spent her entire student debt on his one class that she took because of what it meant to her faith walk. And in our lives together he’s the person that we have often turned to during difficult times in ministry and he usually has some small nugget of truth that resonates with us for months and even years to come. This day was no exception as we found ourselves talking about ministry and the church again. At some point in the conversation he says to us, “You know what the two great sins of the church are? Being boring or being petty.” At the time I kind of shrugged it off, as I am apt to do…but time reveals so much, doesn’t it?

I’ve come to realize how much truth there was to that statement. The first piece is pretty self-explanatory. The last thing the church should ever be boring with is the life-transforming message of the Gospel. The second piece is something we have all lived with and seen in our own contexts. We love to major on the minors. We will go to war in the church over the color of carpet, style of worship, wall decor, etc. And the grudges we hold if we don’t get our way. Paul says this to the people of Colossians, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” – Colossians 3:12-13 Clothe, dress, adorn, put-on love, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience! In other words, don’t be petty. Don’t major on the minors. Keep the first things first.

And if you don’t think pettiness is a big problem consider this adage from the Dalai Lama, “If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito”. Granted, he may have meant this in a positive light, but I have trouble seeing anything positive associated with mosquitoes. If we allow pettiness to dictate our actions, it can destroy relationships, families and even churches over stuff that at the end of the day doesn’t even matter. I have seen friendships ruined over stuff that people shouldn’t even be getting up in arms about, but because they have taken a stand, they can’t back down. And at the end of the day, when we allow pettiness to dictate our actions, we have allowed sin to control our lives…because truly is about me and not about we. I always find myself coming back to the quote by Meldenius, “In essentials unity, in non-essentials liberty, in all things charity.” Perhaps it is time for some of us to learn not to be petty in non-essentials and to clothe ourselves in charity for the sake of our friendships, our churches and the world.

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in the flesh

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I once heard a story about a little girl who was having trouble going to sleep one night. Her father came into the room to remind her that there was no reason to be afraid because God was right there with her. However, even after this reassurance, a few minutes later the girl was calling for her dad again. Her dad came back into the room again and tried to remind her once again that God was right there with her. “But dad, I need someone with skin on.” We might hear this story and think of it as just being a cute anecdote, but it might be a story that calls us to the greatest Christian action that we could practice…being present.

The very beginning of the Jesus story goes a bit like this, “The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us.” – John 1:14 The thing that makes the Jesus story so powerful, so compelling is that God was willing to put on human skin and join us. He was willing to suffer, laugh, play, dance, sing, work, cry, think, move, and share in every other human experience. Not only that, but He set the example for us as to what it meant to be truly human because He was always fully present. As you read the story of Jesus throughout the gospels, you begin to see a trend in his approach towards others. Regardless of the person’s station in life or their spiritual state or status, Jesus was always fully present with them. I even think of the most extreme example where we may even think of Jesus not being present in Matthew 15. A Canaanite woman approaches Jesus and he really doesn’t seem to want to take the time to interact with her as He feels compelled to continue taking His message of healing and redemption to Israel. Yet at the end of the encounter we read this, “Then Jesus said to her, ‘Woman, you have great faith! Your request is granted.’ And her daughter was healed at that moment.” – Matthew 15:28

Now think about this with me for a moment. If Jesus proved His love for those around Him by being present in each and every situation, how much more should we work at being present to those around us? Perhaps if we began to value each conversation, each interaction, each moment as God would have us to, then people might begin to respond to us differently. I can’t help but think of the marvel Jesus had each time He encountered someone new. Even though He knew them, all of a sudden it was real…because they both had skin on. Perhaps if we could come to realize that people are more than agendas, schedules, products, customers, numbers, etc. we might begin to see them with the same awe and wonder that God has for each and every human that ever walked the face of the earth. So may you today seek to be present in a new and real way to those around you. Because you never know when they may need somebody with skin on.


a mystery

Come closer…just for a second. I want to tell you something..

God loves you.

That may not seem like the most earth shattering thing you will hear today, but I want to contend that perhaps it should be.

God. The infinite source of all life. The space in which space takes shape. The ever expanding reality from which galaxies spin into existence. The creative spark that gave birth to light, sound and energy itself. The imagination that hewed mountains and rivers and planets and stars. The same God who intimately looked into our world and gave life to flowers, trees, animals and man. The mind that dreamed into existence all that is. This same God loves you.

The God who understands the fathomless depths to which all knowledge can go. Who holds together the smallest atoms, cells and ultimately the universe itself. The God who takes delight in the quirkiness of platypus’s (sp?) and tarsiers, yet engineers a world that delivers breathtaking sunsets and sunrises. The God who can comprehend everything that is instantaneously without sleeping or slumbering or even batting an eye.  This same God loves you.

How do I know this? It’s a mystery. It’s a mystery that this same God would choose to love us in our brokenness and ineptitude. It’s a mystery that this same God would choose to enter into our situation; being born like us, growing up like us and even dying at our hands. It’s a mystery that this is the limitless bounds to which God’s love would go. That God, the infinite, incomprehensible reality loves you and I so much that he would move death and hell itself to restore relationship with us. Paul made it known in this way, “…the glorious riches of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.” – Colossians 1:27

So what does it mean to say that God loves you? Does it mean that all your problems will magically vanish in this reality? On the contrary…God’s love doesn’t magically change the brokenness of this present age; that part is on us. It rains on both the righteous and the wicked. But God’s love does promise this…if I live into and out of the grace that God extended through His love, then the story does not end here. There is a promise attached to that love. One day, “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’ or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away…[God is] making everything new!”- Revelation 21:4-5 So while we may not be promised riches or fame or power (it would probably be best if we avoided these) we are promised a mystery beyond this life that makes no sense.

So maybe hear these words again and allow them to flow through you today in a new way…

God Loves You.


noisy bells

When our first born son was around four years old we thought it was time to introduce him to the book The Polar Express. After all, he loved trains and it seemed like the right thing to do for Christmas. And in true good parenting fashion we decided we should also introduce him to the movie…which quickly became an obsession. In the midst of all of this we also decided that he needed bell; much like the one received by the little boy in the book. However, a four year old doesn’t always understand yuletide physics and quickly became frustrated. You see, he would grasp that bell with his whole and and shake for all it was worth and yet…there would be no ringing. He couldn’t seem to figure out that holding on to that little bell so tight would mute its noise and so of course in his world, “it broke”. After trying multiple times to help him see how to grasp onto the bell and it not clicking, my wife and I conveniently lost the bell until a more age appropriate Christmas season.

The image of a noisy bell brings to mind one of my favorite passages of scripture. In his letter to the Corinthian church the apostle Paul writes about the greatest of gifts, “f I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.” – I Corinthians 13:1 The imagery of a resounding gong could even be translated as an empty, loud annoying brass bell. Paul is saying to us that if we don’t have love, all of our blustering lip service to the world around us is just that…noise. And not good noise either…but loud unproductive obnoxious noise. Our world today is full of noise. If you have been out shopping at all during the Christmas season you know this to be true. People hustling and bustling to get everything they need to make the season bright. But I am wondering if this is a huge and loud misrepresentation of the season.

Charles Wesley, a great hymn writer and one of the theological fathers of our faith, once penned these words to describe the Christmas story, “He left his Father’s throne above so free, so infinite his grace. Emptied himself of all but love…” Emptying, letting go and allowing love to be all. This was the Christmas story of Christ. But I think all to often we find ourselves like that little four year old when it comes to life. We hold on to our things, our loved ones, our dogma, our traditions, our way of doing things so tight that all of a sudden we are just making noise. Love isn’t ringing through us because it has become about us and not about those who we are called to love. Love is a hard thing. It’s the one action where when you know all motives are fixed on another then you finally have it right. And that is what the Christmas story was about. God letting go of everything in order to show us love. Maybe we need to let loose of some things in our life so that we can truly show the love of Christ to those around us this Christmas. Maybe then we will no longer be a noisy gong/bell/brass/cymbal, but instead may join in the angelic chorus, “Glory to God in the highest heaven,
    and on earth peace among those whom he favors!”


love

I’m not sure how most of your homes work, but ours has always had a division of labor. Certain tasks fall to my wife and certain tasks fall to me. With the exception of rocking infants, one of my tasks has always been the bedtime ritual. I imagine a large part of the motivation of this division is due to my wife’s exhaustion after handling the kids most of the day, but it is a task I have gladly accepted. This usually includes making sure teeth are brushed, pajamas are on, stories are read, prayers are said and kisses and hugs are distributed equally. Last night as I was putting the bigs (this is now the affectionate term given to the two older kids) to bed I leaned over to hug my daughter and she blurted out, “God loves you, God loves me, God loves the whole world and God loves grandmother” (I’m still not sure why my maternal grandmother gets her own line, but if you knew her you might understand that a bit more). But I was touched by her innocence and the profoundness of that assurance that she had.

I think sometimes we think differently about God’s love. Maybe we feel it is something that we have to earn. Maybe we feel sometimes we think it is something that we aren’t deserving of. Maybe sometimes we think it is meant for someone else and not for us. Maybe sometimes we get that turned around and think of others as unlovable by God. But I come back to this again, “God loves you, God loves me, God loves the whole world.” We find this declaration in one of the most often quoted passages of scripture in the whole of the Bible. “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” – John 3:16. It doesn’t say that God loved a certain portion of the world. Or that God loved the people that look like me, act like me, dress like me, etc. The text says that God loved(s) the world…This is why he came. This is why he gave his life. Because he loves us all.

I have read many books about theology and Biblical thought in my scholastic career and in my time as a pastor. But I really think that sometimes we forget how simple this message is for you and for me. Sometimes I like to sing the following to myself as a little reminder:   Jesus loves me this I know,
For the Bible tells me so;
Little ones to Him belong,
They are weak but He is strong.
Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
Yes, Jesus loves me!
The Bible tells me so.

“God loves you, God loves me, God loves the whole world”. If you get nothing else from this today, I pray that you are able to rest in the love of God. A love that was not passive, but gave everything to redeem you. A love that is never-ending, unstoppable, always and forever, divine in nature, looking beyond my faults and calling me his own kind of love. This is the kind of love God has for you and for me.

 

 

 


love loosely

This morning I said goodbye to my wife for a few days and watched her drive away to the airport that will wing her away to Atlanta for some time with her mother.* I never really like being apart from my spouse…in fact I hate it. The house feels different, I don’t sleep that great and it feels as if something is missing. But at the end of the day, who am I to control what may or may not happen while we are apart. I don’t want to get to morbid here, but my wife may not make it back home. Then again, when she drives down the street to go to the grocery store there is a chance she might not make it back. I am not even guaranteed the next moment with my kids for that matter. You didn’t see that coming did you?

The writer of the book of James in the New Testament put it this way. “Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. – James 4:13-14. But we don’t really like to think about that do we? We like to look around at our life and cling to it as if it will go on forever. We like to pursue immortality in all of its forms of diet, surgical, fitness induced spectacle. We even hold on tightly to our spouses, our kids, our friends, our houses, our hard-earned money, our possessions, etc. But that’s the thing…these things are not even really ours to begin with. In fact, that same writer put it this way earlier in this letter, “Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters. Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights” – James 1:16-17. All that we are and all that we “have” is a gift.

So what am I saying? Don’t love for fear of being hurt or fear of loss…by no means. In fact, your love should be even more wild, extravagant, logic defying. We love because we don’t know what tomorrow may hold. We make the most of every opportunity with our loved ones, our family, our friends, our neighbors because that is actually what love does. It enjoys and treasures the gift while it can. I think about the two little foster boys in our home now. There is a chance that they could be with us for up to a year and then be restored to their bio-family. And the question is always, “Aren’t you afraid you will get too attached?” And my answer, “I hope so”. Because love works that way. It’s extravagant and wild and at the same time open-handed and loose because we never know what tomorrow holds. So today I pray that you love big, bold, extravagantly, loosely knowing that it could hurt, you might suffer and you may grieve because love endures all things.

 

*For those of you concerned for my well-being, don’t worry. I only got left with 3 out 4 kids. I got this.

 


where does it all lead?

So…I’m a nerd. I know for many of you that doesn’t come as much of a surprise. But I enjoy all things comic book, superhero, sci-fi, fantasy, etc. It shouldn’t surprise you either that when the new Star Wars film came out late this last year that my son and I were in line on opening night in costume. That kind of reveals to you the depth of the nerdiness and its influence upon our household. Recently I was actually reminded of one of my favorite quotes from this movie franchise that actually comes from my least favorite of the movies. In Episode 1, Yoda (the Jedi guru type) is speaking to young Anakin Skywalker and he says, “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.”

The reason this line has come to mind is my general concern for the health and well-being of the church. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve probably come to realize that a lot of the political rhetoric that has been occurring in the United States lately has been coming from a place of fear and anger. And sadly enough that same rhetoric has taken root in the church as well. My brothers and sisters, anger and fear have no place in the body of Christ. In his epistle the apostle James, the brother of Christ, had this to say, “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,  because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.” James 1:19-20 Likewise in the 1 Epistle of John we find this,  “This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” – 1 John 4:17-18 ‘Anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires’. ‘There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear”.

The reason this concerns me so much is that it is killing our witness and our voice for true Kingdom transformation. Please hear me, when we the church operate out of a sense of anger or fear, we no longer represent the Christ we confess. Much like the aforementioned quote from Star Wars, we ultimately compromise who we are intended to be and end up walking in darkness instead of light. So my question to us today; in the midst of all of this political chaos and confusion, are your actions/posts/statements/conversations/etc. originating from a place of love and grace? Or do you find yourself responding out of fear and anger? I myself cannot go there. It is too easy to hold grudges, to distance the other, to be angry or to be afraid. Instead we are called to take up our cross; the ultimate symbol of grace, love and forgiveness. I’ll leave you with this quote from Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. which is just as true today as it was 50 years ago. “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”


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